House Full

Since I am home during the day now, we set up some appointments to get some things looked at in the house.  It seemed like all the sudden there were these items that popped up that neither one of us had the ability to fix.  Eric called our home warranty company regarding the different items and they said they would call back within 24 hours to schedule a time to come to the house within the next week.  Scratch that.  Everyone and their brother came over today within a 8-hour period.  I was glad to have such a speedy response but it was a bit overwhelming. The plumber came to look at a leaking toilet and our hot water heater.  The HVAC guy came to look at the blower motor in the furnace.  The electrician figured out what was wrong with our master bathroom lights.  The high speed internet guys came to figure out why our internet speed was so slow and intermittently cutting out.  A general contractor came to give Eric a bid for the master bathroom floor since the slow leak in the toilet was starting to bubble the linoleum in there. 

At 8:35 this morning when I found out that the first of many people were coming over, I thought that today was going to be disastrous.  The boys have been teething and full on boycotting nap time.  Amazingly, Abraham took two 2-hour naps today despite all the in and out of people and all the loud voices.  Our killer attack dogs Suzie and Scooter also threw in some barking for good measure.  Winston was in a much better mood today and I was soooo thankful.  The little guy had been wearing me down.  Here is the crazy thing.  Winston woke up from a nap and I laid him down to do a diaper change.  He smiled at me and I saw something on his upper arch.  I did not think it could be a tooth already but it most definitely was.  The little dude has cut both of his eye teeth or lateral incisors.  I am not quite sure which ones they are because it's hard to assess how much space his teeth would take, how close together, etc.  It definitely looks like his eye teeth.  I now know why he was so grumpy.  Apparently those eye teeth are extra painful when they come in.  He is my little vampire baby for now.  I checked Abraham and no sign of his yet but he did cut a lower lateral incisor last week.  These boys are totally different in some regards.

Thankful that we can get stuff fixed around here.  Thankful for a home warranty.  Thankful that the boys had a good day.  Thankful I can be home to love on my boys and smooch their cheeks as much as I want.  Thankful for my husband bringing me home roses just because. 

********************************************************************************
Today is the last day of NaBloPoMo.  It feels good to accomplish a goal.  I doubted I could do it but I managed to get a post done everyday.  I learned how to write and compose faster which is a very valuable skill.  I will be slowing down the blogging pace from here on out for a while.  I want to focus on getting stuff done around my house and getting ready for the Christmas season.

FAQs #3

Wow, you had two kids all in one shot.  Now you can be done.

or

You're done right?
or
Do you still want to have more children?

Oh boy.  I have heard variations of these questions soooo many times.  Those questions are very personal and quite frankly are nobody's business except for me and my husband.  Sometimes it is phrased as just an assumption and a declarative statement.  I started getting this question even before the boys were born.  People did not even give us a chance to adjust to being first time parents times two before bombarding us with the questions.  I was simply trying to get used to having two babies and was not thinking about if and when I was having more.  To give a direct non-direct answer, we are pro-baby and pro-adoption.  It is our desire to add another child(ren) to our family.  I don't know what path God will take us on.  Right now we are just enjoying the little guys that we have been blessed with. 

Aren't you scared of having another set of twins?

If I had been asked that when the boys were two months old, I would have leaned towards yes.  The bonus to having twins as the first born children is that we don't know any better.  All we have ever known is twice the diapers, baths, laundry, cost and crying along with half the amount of sleep.  On the other side of that equation is that we have only ever known twice the coos, giggles, smiles and hugs.  It was super hard those first three months but each month has gotten better.  Now I cannot imagine not having both of my little guys here with us.  I think it is absolutely amazing that God allowed us to have these babies and we would gladly welcome another double blessing.  When we found out that we had conceived twins, we felt it was very apparent that God wanted us to be parents.  If He was pleased to give us another set of multiples then we would be thrilled.  Besides, having another set of twins would allow us to perfect everything we learned the first time around. 

Just One Day

I have accomplished one day now as a SAHM (stay at home mom).  The boys are at a really pivotal stage developmentally and I am really thankful that the Lord saw fit for me to stay home with them at this time.  Abraham is starting to develop separation anxiety.  I walk into the next room and he gets upset.  I have to keep talking to him to help him try to understand that I have not left him.  Both boys are getting little tempers at times and Winston even arches his back and kicks his legs.  Where do kids even learn that?  Isn't it amazing how intrinsic (cough...total depravity) it is for them to act that way?  The boys are also becoming competitive in regards to attention from me.  I can play with and hold one baby for a while and then go spend some time with the other baby and the original baby starts wigging out.  I obviously want to quash that competitiveness.  I want them to understand that I love them both equally and that they should be happy to see their brother loved in the same way that they are.

I know that I have a big transition to go through.  My biggest concern is creating a healthy balance of spending good time with the boys but also getting things done around the house when Eric is at work.  I don't want to be slothful and waste too much time.  I had a good talk with Eric in regards to goals and expectations for the coming weeks.  We agreed that there should be goals but to limit any expectations. By expectations I mean things that I expect from myself or things that Eric could expect from me.  The problem with expectations is that they are not always realistic. Something I am trying to do to keep progressing forward in getting into a new routine is to keep a daily journal or record of items that I get done and goals for the week to accomplish.  For example, one thing for today was that I gave the dogs a bath and trimmed their nails so that got written down.  A lot of little things will eventually add up to the big goals. 

One thing I have been working on is introducing more variety into the boys' diet and letting them explore touch and taste by feeding themselves.  Even at four months they were starting to grab for food so I knew they were ready.  I did not want to get them too dependent on being fed all the time.  Winston loves food no matter the form and is taking to feeding himself pretty well.  Abraham is definitely more picky in regards to texture and flavor.  Both little guys love their apples however.  Winston has managed to bite off big chunks with his teeth so we watch pretty carefully to make sure he does not try to swallow the whole thing.  Here they are:

Thanksgiving Memories

Thanksgiving 2009 in WA with Grandpa, Grandma, Jason and Rachel.  That was such a great weekend getting to meet Eric's extended family.  We were thankful to share that holiday with Grandpa while he was still doing well and could enjoy the visit. 

More Triple Date

These are some more pics from our fun triple date.  We walked around Sand Harbor at Lake Tahoe and went our for sushi. 

 Aaron and Alicia

 Eric and me

 Adam and Alisha

 Sushi-woot!

The whole group

Today was a nice relaxing Saturday.  We are just enjoying our family and friends right now.  Hope you all are having a great weekend!

Triple Date

We got to go on a group date today with Adam, Ally, Alicia and Aaron.  That's a whole lot of 'A' names, huh?  It's a good thing Eric and I broke the trend.  Our little group represented the dating couple, the newlywed couple and the married with children couple.  The boys got to spend some time with Grammy and Grandpa and the rest of us adults drove up to the lake (as in Tahoe).  It was soooo busy with the holiday weekend but the weather could not have been more perfect.  It was cool and crisp but felt just right when sitting in the sun.  We got coffee and just sat outside and talked for a while.  Then we drove to Sand Harbor, walked around and took some pics.  After that we drove down the hill and topped off the night by going out for sushi.

Now let me tell you the background on the sushi.  Eric and I both love it.  Before we had the kids we would go out about once a month.  When we found out we were pregnant we knew we needed to cut back.  Then when we found out we were having twins we knew we really needed to cut back.  Needless to say, there were no sushi dates any longer (plus pregnant women are not supposed to eat it).  We made a commitment that we would not go out to sushi until our debt was paid off or we could afford for me to stay home with the boys.  Every time we would get something paid off we would joke that we were one more step closer to going out for sushi.  After Eric getting his new job and me getting to resign from mine, we still had not done anything to celebrate or commemorate all the happenings.  Fortunately everyone in the group was a sushi fan so that is what we decided to do for dinner.  We went to a local place that Eric and Adam used to love going to years back.  The restaurant had been sold and apparently went down hill.  Eric had heard that the original owners had bought it back and that the food was really good again.  Oh. my. goodness.  It was amazing and all that I had been dreaming of.  The nigiri melted in my mouth and all the specialty rolls were so tasty.  It was a great evening with my hubby and extended family with lots of laughs. My belly was so happy and full.  I should mention that Eric had eaten sushi when he was on a business trip several weeks back but that did not count for our little game because it was for work.  All I can say is that I think I enjoyed my sushi all the more because of what it meant, that we had reached our goal!
 
In the effort to get out of the house, I forgot our camera so for right now I just have some cell phone pics to share until I can get copies from the other cameras.

 This was on our way to drop the boys off.  The local ranches move cattle 

as winter draws near.  It is a fun reminder that we live in rural area and in a small town.

A&A and A&A at the sushi bar

 My man

I am enjoying this long weekend with my hubby and still trying to process that I do not have to go to work on Monday.  Eeek!

First Thanksgiving

This was the boys' first Thanksgiving.  I have been looking forward to the boys' first holiday season. I love, love, love having a family.  A&W decided to boycott all naps today due to the excitement of having a house full of people.  They were really good all afternoon despite being tired.  They were very much ready for bed tonight and are now fast asleep. 

We had a wonderful meal and fellowship around the table.  It was a lot of work hosting for the first time but very much worth it.  We have been so blessed in the past year with the safe arrival of our little boys, the purchase of our first home together, financial provision and a new job for Eric.  We have our health and family and friends who love us.  I am married to my best friend and cannot imagine my life without him.  The reality is that I would not have a concept of how blessed I am if it were not for my relationship with my Lord.  I am a great sinner in need of a great Savior and I see how good He is to me despite of myself.  Life is good because God is good.

Some pictures of our wonderful day:

 Eric's masterpiece: The Pioneer Turkey

 The boys got their first pickle.  I am not sure what Eric was chuckling about 

here but I got him in the middle of it.

 Auntie Alicia and her beau Aaron

 The newlyweds: Uncle Adam and Auntie Ally

 Grandpa and Grammy

 This was what I wanted, my family around the table.

 Winston watching and listening to great Grandma Guddat on Skype. 

 Abraham kept smiling at great Grandma Guddat on the screen.  Isn't it crazy how our kids will always find technology like this to be normal?  Technology is amazing!

 I am so blessed by my family. I look at this picture and see my dreams realized.  As for the boys, they thought the pumpkins were more interesting than being photographed.

 Green beans and pumpkin for dinner.

 Auntie Ally made this.  Amazing right?

 

Mama JoJo tried out a new recipe: Italian Coffee cupcakes

After a rousing game of Uno, we are kicking off the Christmas season by watching Elf.  It's been a good day.  Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

Getting ready for Thanksgiving. Our festive dining room.







- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Finality

Tomorrow is my last day at my job.  I have been packing up and clearing my desk since last week.  I had lunch today with a group of coworkers that wanted to send me off.  I have been saying my good-byes as I see people.  It is all so final. 

I am really excited about spending more time with my boys, focusing more on my husband and getting more things done around the house.  I just know that it is going to take me a little while to get into a new routine.  The first week I will probably feel like I am on vaction and by week two will be wondering if I should be checking in with my boss.  It is a weird tumble of emotions right now.  I don't always like change. I don't like feeling like I am leaving things behind.  Intellectually I am full steam ahead but emotionally I am trying to reconcile things.  Pride can cause us to think that we are indispendable, that we are the progenitors of our roles whatever they may be.  As a stay at home mom I know I am not going to be hearing, "You just did great work" or "What you just did was really important" from my two babies. The reality is that I am truly going to be doing great work, doing important things, in the lives of my children.  There may not be recognition of that from them for many years to come (or never) and that's okay.  Everything we do is done before the Lord so I do it for Him and not for myself. 

Every time I hear this song on Christian radio, it reminds me that whether I am a working mom or a stay at home mom, I do every little thing for the glory of God. We can all use this little reminder at times:

Face Time

Eric is on the road this week, so we get to have nightly phone dates via Face Time.  Eric and I did the whole long distance relationship throughout our courtship and for most of our engagement.  It was not all that long ago, only 4.5 years ago, that our relationship started yet technology has changed so much in that time.  Eric and I each had to text using standard flip phones.  Remember having to key through to each letter and needing to start all over again if you passed it up?  Eric was so sweet and shy when it came to getting to know me so he would send me texts to test the waters so to speak.  I finally told him to just call me because as you know the old school method of texting was tedious.  And even more than that, neither of us had unlimited texting.  It only took one month of me going over on my cell phone minutes and text plan, and I switched to the same service provider as him.  Now we have fancy, shmancy smart phones and can text real fast with our QWERTY keyboards and we can video chat.  Can you imagine if we had all that when we were dating?  Now that the babies are here it is a real blessing that he can see them and talk to them.  It is so sweet watching the boys listening to his voice, looking for him and eventually realizing it is his face on the screen of the phone.

Photo credit

I bought a girly pink cover for my phone like this.

Eric and I were both commenting that the bonus of him being gone on occasion for work is that it often feels like we are dating when he calls at night.  I feel shy and goofy talking to him.  I get all nervous and excited about him coming home.  I am thankful that it causes me to not take him for granted.  It can be so easy in a marriage to take one another for granted, to get so comfortable with the day to day that we don't look at one another with the admiration and appreciation that the other person deserves.  Eric is my husband but he's also still my boyfriend. 

Breastfeeding: The Generational Divide

As the title infers, this post is going to be about breastfeeding.  If you don't care about that then you should stop reading...





...but if you're still here then it may be of interest to you because you're a mom or there is woman in your life that is breastfeeding.  I always wanted to breastfeed.  I can't really explain it but it was an important aspect of motherhood for me.  When I found out we were having twins I knew there would be an even greater challenge in breastfeeding two babies.  I met a MoM when I was pregnant that told me that she breastfed for 3.5 months before quitting.  It became too hard when she went back to work.  I remember thinking at the time, "Really, that's it? That is not very long." Now that I have been through the gauntlet of breastfeeding newborn twins myself, I understand what a challenge getting to 3.5 months really is.  I admire any woman for attempting to nurse their twins, triplets and beyond.  It can be so tough emotionally and physically.  I cried many, many times out of the frustration of bad latches and having lazy eaters.  I would watch the clock as I was in agonizing pain hoping that they were getting what they needed and trying to last as long as I could.  I was very dependent on my pump for the first three months.  My supply was not quite enough and I had to supplement.  I wondered if I should quit for my own mental and emotional health.  Ultimately my babies needed a happy and healthy mom and I wasn't sure if I was putting the idea of breastfeeding on a pedestal and making it an idol of my heart.

I trudged on however and when I went back to work pumped three times a day, every break and lunch hour, to keep my supply up.  Each month went by and it got better.  Now we have reached eight months and are going strong.  I have no immediate intent to wean the boys.  I think they will let me know as the time comes.  Nursing frequency will naturally taper off with increased solids and table food.  Eventually I will probably do the "don't ask, don't refuse" method and let the boys wean themselves. 

What I have found in the last months is that there is a generational divide when it comes to breastfeeding.  Just from personal experience, a lot of women that have not had children within the last 15-20 years are a lot more ambivalent towards breastfeeding.  Sometimes it is more than just mere ambivalence and they can act threatened that you are making a different choice than they did.  I grew up with the knowledge that breast was best when it came to the health of baby and the mother.  Women that are my grandmothers' age never even considered breastfeeding.  According to my dad's mom, there was the well-touted Similac and each expectant mom bought eight glass bottles with a metal ring holder to daily sanitize.  My grandma was not anti-breastfeeding when it came to me and my boys but I could tell she didn't get it; she had no personal experience to look back on.  My mom personally breastfed me and my brother so I had a really positive association with it.  Unfortunately my mom was not around to help encourage me in the early months with the boys because she lives in another state.  I am blessed that Eric was there for me every step of the way, if he had not I would have given up. It was and can be discouraging when older women, who in my mind should be encouraging younger women in this natural aspect of child rearing, make comments like, "Oh, you're still breastfeeding?"  Whereas younger women say it in a positive way, "You're still breastfeeding? That's awesome!" And I am not even going into the hot topic debate of nursing in public, nursing covers vs. no nursing covers, state laws, etc. 

I feel grateful that I can breastfeed my babies.  It is something I can do for them that no else can.  I enjoy the bonding that it provides.  I like knowing that I can provide the best nutrition available for them.  In saying that, I am not pushing my personal decisions on anybody.  Many women choose for a variety of reasons not to breastfeed or are not physically able to.  That is what formula is for.  Heck, I used formula to supplement.  Yay for formula!  I am simply trying to say that it is a blessing that I got this far and I feel grateful for each day I get to have a successful breastfeeding relationship with my children because it was and continues to be really important to me. 

For many women this is old info but here is why breastfeeding is the preferred nutrition for the first six months of a child's life:

• Breastfeeding saves a lot of money.  We have saved over a thousand dollars in the last eight months.  The only cost to me was my pump because I work full time. 
• The cells, hormones, and antibodies in breast milk protect babies from sickness. Formula-fed babies have higher rates of ear infection and diarrhea. Formula-fed babies also have higher risks of:
• Necrotizing enterocolitis, a disease that affects the gastrointestinal tract in preterm infants.
• Lower respiratory infections
• Asthma
• Obesity
• Type 2 diabetes
• Some research shows that breastfeeding can also reduce the risk of Type 1 diabetes, childhood leukemia, and atopic dermatitis in babies. Breastfeeding has also been shown to lower the risk of SIDS (sudden infant death syndrome).
• Breastfeeding can be good for the mother’s health too. Breastfeeding is linked to a lower risk of these health problems in women:
• Type 2 diabetes
• Breast cancer
• Ovarian cancer
• Postpartum depression
• Studies show that breastfeeding mothers lose post-partum weight more quickly than women who formula feed.
• Breastfeeding releases oxytocin, the 'love hormone' that increases a sense of well-being for the mother and helps her bond with baby. 
• Breasfeeding can be vital in an emergency where water may be contaminated. It is always available in its self-renewing source. It is always the perfect temperature and can protect against hypothermia.  We take that for granted in the U.S. but breastfeeding is a life line to many babies whose mothers do not have access to clean drinking water or adequate shelter. 
• Breastfeeding benefits society.  Breastfed babies are sick less meaning their parents miss less days from work and are more productive. Medical costs are lower for babies that are breastfed.

There are so many more emotional benefits as well.  It's important to realize that our American idea of weaning is very different than world wide norms.  The WHO (World Health Organization) recommends breastfeeding for a minimum of two years.  So with that thought I will be giving my kids 'first breakfast' tomorrow morning around 6 a.m. and will be pumping for them at work tomorrow.  I took it one day at a time and am so happy we got this far. 

Saturday Busyness

Today we went grocery shopping and got all the fixings for our Thanksgiving dinner.  We also picked up paint and supplies for finishing up the dining room area.  We took the boys shopping and they were absolute dolls.  They smiled at everyone they saw.  Total time away from home was about four hours and there were no melt downs.  They pretty much missed a nap but it turned out alright.  It makes me encouraged that down the road I can take the boys on longer errand runs.  When we were out we ran into a couple that we had taken our childbirth class with and they had their identical twin girls with them.  It was so much fun trading stories for a couple of minutes and seeing their little girls.  People love babies and they especially find twins enamoring.

As of right now we have the wall almost done.  It's a color called Autumn Maple.  Perfect for Thanksgiving, right? The door is going to take a while longer because we have to take it off the frame to paint it. 

A picture is worth a thousand words, right?

Nothing too exciting happening over here.  Just getting geared up for the holiday.  It's going to be a bit of busy week with me finishing up work indefinitely and Eric going out of town for a business trip.  I am telling myself that I just need to push through till Thursday.  The good news is that I won't have to go back to work the following Monday.

Random Friday

Happy Friday Everyone!

The randomness in my head:

-Excited to go to a bridal shower tomorrow.  I have spent the last three weekends at home with the boys and am looking forward to some girl time.  We are all healthy again.  Praise the Lord!

-Finishing up the shopping list for the Thanksgiving menu.  Really looking forward to the grubbin'.

-We need to finish painting a wall in our new to us dining room.  It's the wall that had the door installed so we have to cover up the spackle job around the trim.  We are going to add some more color to the house and I am excited about finally making our place more homey. 

-We also got an entry ladder to our attic installed.  This means we can clear the garage floor and get a car back in there.  Revolutionary idea, right? 

-Trying to process that I have only have three days of work left.  Crazy.  Fortunately I am on track to finish a project that I have going. 

-We have had incredibly high winds here today.  There is a really bad fire in Reno.  Pray for the families that have lost their homes and the firefighters that are working tirelessly to stop it. 

-Sometimes I look back on my previous post and am in awe over my typos and grammar.  I try people but I am trying to crank these things out on a daily basis for NaBloPoMo and my brain is tending to shut off when I am writing these things.  I read yesterday's post and thought, "Did I really put the word 'statistcally'?  I am making up words over here!"  Really, I normally pride myself on spelling so it's a good thing to be humbled and laugh at my blunders. 

-These were my sweet boys right before bed tonight. When they are really tired they fall asleep right on the nursing pillow:

FAQs #2

Are your twins natural?  Did you have IVF or use fertility treatments?

Our twins were conceived spontaneously.  In my mind, using fertility treatments in order to conceive in no way diminishes the wonderful miracle of bringing a child into the world.  It is a super personal decision for a couple to arrive at and therefore people should not ask strangers about their reproductive choices but alas they often do.  I get asked all the time...sigh. 

Do twins run in your family?

Yes, fraternal twins run in my family.  I have cousins that are boy/girl twins and my maternal grandmother had fraternal twin brothers.  The fact that our twins are identical or monozygotic made it that much more of a surprise.  Statistically there are not higher occurrences of monozygotic twins in certain geographic regions or ethnicities like there are fraternal twins.  The research has not been conclusive if there is a genetic link to monozygotic twinning. 

Were your twins really born more than five hours apart or was that a typo on the birth announcement?

Yep, they really were born more than five hours apart and it definitely was not a typo.  Once Abraham was born, Winston who had been in the breech position flipped to the vertex position.  He had lots of room in my very distended uterus and was in no hurry to come out.  My labor was augmented with pitocin so that I did not have a significant stall in labor after delivering Abraham.  After about 2.5 hours of no real progress, I had to push Winston down in order to get him into position.  It took about another 2.5 hours of active pushing but I got my 7 lb. 9 oz. twin baby out after a posterior presentation.  If not for the pitocin, I am pretty sure they would have been born on different days and my OB actually had a couple of twin moms' whose twin babies had different birthdays.  I think people are so used to twins either being delivered by c-section or the second twin being manually extracted that they forget or don't realize that it can take quite a few hours to deliver another baby if the body is left to its own devices. 

As an aside, my dear grandma lives in a retirement community with many other Dutch emigrants.  When the boys were born she went around telling everyone the news and the boys' relevant stats.  A lady who supposedly had identical twins herself told my grandma that there was no way that our babies were identical twins because they would need to be born within minutes of each other.  My grandma got pretty indignant and told her, "My granddaughter went to college and she studied science.  I know that she knows and that's that."  Apparently it turned into a bit of a squabble and the activities director encouraged them to be more civil about it.  I love that my grandma had such confidence in my educational background but I am A&W's mother, shouldn't I be the one to know regardless?  People never cease to amaze me. 

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

Mama puts hats on the boys in the morning before they head out the door. You can see how they feel about them:

 Abraham

Winston

The Midnight Hour

We just said good-bye to some friends a couple of minutes ago and as I was walking down the hall to get ready for bed I realized I had not done a post.  I am still on board for NaBloPoMo.  It is nearly the midnight hour both literally and figuratively but I am getting it done. 

We do not normally go to bed super early even on weeknights but we had a great reason to stay up even later tonight.  We got to have some friends, Josh and Sarah, over that we only get to see occasionally like once or twice a year.  The conversation always flows with them and I appreciate the versatility and variation of conversation between us all.  Tomorrow morning I am not going to be loving life when that alarm clock goes off but it was totally worth it.  Relationships and getting to know people is important.  It has been hard maintaining friendships these last several months with adjusting to parenthood times two.  Any opportunity that friends make to come over and hang out is always more than welcome.  It's amazing how in the course of an evening so many different topics can be touched upon.  We talked about babies, new parenthood, juicing, blogging, iPhones, church life, television, Craigslist, home ownership, Mormonism and who knows what else I am forgetting.  It's evenings and conversation like that that I thrive on. 

What makes you light up and excited about life?  I love that it can be something as simple as a nice evening with friends.

Mum-mums, Dadas and Kisses

So I feel like poor Winston has gotten a bad rap the last couple of days in my posts.  I need to be clear that I don't view one of my children as a problem child.  I don't have an easy child nor a more difficult one.  Trust me when I say that Abraham and Winston both take their turns being the more difficult baby.  It can change day by day.  We wake up in the morning and by the time they have eaten and been dressed, I generally know who is going to have a better day.  Eric and I were recently commenting that at least it tends to only be one of them that has a bad day.  They do feed off of each other's disposition at times.  This especially happens at meal times when the whining of one gets the other going.  All in all however we feel so grateful to have such sweet and happy baby boys.

I could kiss those little cheeks all day.

Winston had a difficult few days and it may been teething that was the culprit.  He just was not his normal happy self.  He has made up for it by calling us by name though.  This is legit; the child is beginning to speak.  I have noticed that when he is in the exersaucer and he wants out he has been saying 'mum-mum.' I thought it was a fluke but it was becoming more and more consistent.  Then Eric told me he noticed it as well and that Winston was looking right at me when he said it.  I absolutely love the way he says it.  At one point over the weekend, I picked him up after he was calling for me and he immediately did his little open mouthed kiss to my cheek.  The kiss is more like a bonk on the head but it makes my heart burst with love.  I always kiss the boys' cheeks as soon as I pick them up so it's something Winston picked up.  I feel so excited that he is learning new things. Winston was also practicing more of his 'dadas' over the weekend.  It makes my heart so happy to see him looking at Eric and calling him by name.  Abraham is still more inclined to say dada rather than mama and that's okay.  I have just noticed that Winston is more verbal at this stage--using actuals tones and word sounds rather than shrieks or coos.  So these little guys have their own unique strengths and that is exciting to see. 

Cheers for my little Winston!

Loving and Correcting

I recently talked about our beliefs when it comes to children, sin and salvation.  The first several months of being first time parents to twins is pure survival mode. We had no clue how to get the babies into a routine and were so exhausted.  Now that having two babies is part of our normal routine, as well as seeing their little personalities develop, there is a greater burden and sense of needing to teach our children.  I was recently asked in an e-mail if we were already disciplining.  I think the question was supposed to be more of a joke but the answer is actually yes.  I hope that's not too shocking but let me explain. 

Everyone knows that newborns have no sense of self-control.  Their innate sense is to cry to let you know their needs.  They will keep crying until they get those needs met with no sense of who is doing it.  As a child ages however, they have an understanding that it is mom and dad that meets their needs.  This can turn into manipulation via temper tantrums and whining.  Mom and dad want the temper tantrum or whining to stop so they give the child immediate gratification.  The child knows how to work mom and dad and they are the ones actually in control of the parent-child relationship.  Abraham and Winston are at the stage where they understand routine and consistency.  They are used to eating at certain times of the day, having nap times and going to bed at an appointed hour.  They do not however always agree with what we have planned for them.  Recently we have been getting more temper tantrums from the boys.  They understand the word 'no' because we reinforce it.  One thing they do that drives me nuts is when they wake up from a nap after a certain amount of time and flip out that I go to change their diaper.  They want to either eat or play, not be laid down for a diaper change.  Of course I prevail and get it done.  First tactic to reduce the tantrum is distraction.  I talk to them, sing to them, tickle them, etc. so that they do not go on.  Sometimes they insist on doing it though and that is when I tell them no.  I will wait for them to calm down so that I can finish rather than fighting against them.  I tell them as I am waiting that they need to calm down.  I explain that they are making the task they do not like last even longer.  We believe that correcting is discipline.  We believe that child training is discipline.  Discipline can have this connotation of being things like time outs or spanking but it's all the things we do to train our children out of love for them.  We can either reinforce good or bad behaviors.  Discipline has to be age appropriate obviously and right now we are working on what 'no' is as a foundation to build upon. 

Now here is where I say that while we may have these convictions, we are first time parents and learning every day (or at least are trying to) how we should go about this.  Parenting is the most humbling and sanctifying experience.  I think about how we have two first borns to potentially screw up and it's terrifying.  This where prayer comes in and pleading for lots of grace to go about things in the right way.  I think about this journey all the time and what it entails.  Eric and I discuss the appropriate way to go about correcting the boys.  There are so many variables.  If the boys are cranky because they are tired and it has been us that has extended them past a nap time then that responsibilty falls on us and not them.  Same goes for them being hungry or feeling ill.  It's tough gauging what the issue truly is sometimes that is causing the bad behavior.  Regardless though they need to learn that they cannot scream out of frustration or because they are not feeling well.  And sometimes I am just tired of listening to it so I give in.  I pick up the toy they dropped for the umpteenth time because I don't want to listen to the whining anymore. 

The thing that is so scary for me to think about is that it is never going to get any easier.  These boys are going to change and grow and the problems with them.  It is all so humbling.  I need to remember that we are not doing this out of sheer resolve on our own but instead relying on God to help us.  We are the guardians to these children that we have been entrusted with and ultimately are just trying to take the best care of them that we can.  I know I am a sinner and that I am going to fail.  Praise be to God that He is gracious and forgiving. 

If you're wondering what inspired this post, we had a very cranky child (cough...Winston) all day again that really tested our patience.  I was thinking about how I am going to need to grow in patience in order to be a good parent.  So all this heaviness needs some lightness.  Here is a video of the boys today.  This would be using distraction, overcoming whining with giggles:

Shifting the House Around

We're on the mend but more slowly than we would like.  Right now I still have a splitting head ache but I am awake and still writing because I really want to try and follow through with NaBloPoMo.  I have a greater appreciation for the fact that moms and dads don't get sick days.  The idea of getting to stay in bed all day in order to recover quickly is completely foreign to me now.  Laying on the couch and watching movies? Ha! I now also understand why it takes parents of little children so much longer to recover from sickness--there is not too much down time to relax except for naps.  And even naps are not synchronized in our house.  Winston was also so cranky today.  I am not used to my boys being cranky all the time like that so that was tiring as well. 

In the midst of sickness this past week, we bought an entertainment center off of Craiglist.  Since the boys are rolling all around and trying to grab for things, we knew that pretty soon with them crawling that we really needed to contain stuff better.  We had a hand me down TV stand that had sharp corners and was not enough storage for DVD's and speakers and whatever else needed to be hidden from the boys.  We now have a huge entertainment center that we can hide everything in.  We have been watching Craigslist for quite a while to find something we liked at the right price.  Eric spotted the unit and after taking a look at it decided it was a good buy.  He picked up it the other night with a friend and they got it unloaded at the house.  Eric's ear was really starting to bother him at that point and I know that it was not easy for him to get that unit moved in here with his head throbbing.  We had decided to shift around the rooms of the house turning the family room off the kitchen into the dining area, the dining area into a play area for the boys and the front room into the family room.  I am sure that is really confusing and I will post pictures to clarify later.  We got the entertainment center moved in and then the energy was all spent.  We got nothing moved or arranged yesterday because we just did not feel well.  We were pretty much bums all day but seeing all the furniture haphazard and the house a mess drove us crazy.  So this morning we rallied and got a bulk of the moving done...well, at least enough that we can move around without tripping over a baby swing or some furniture item. 

Tomorrow is another Sunday that we will be staying home from church...sigh.  I am trying to tell myself that we are just getting this out of the way early in the flu season.  Hopefully tomorrow will be even a better day. 

Sicky Sick

There is no "Random Friday" post today.  Eric and I are sick.  After battling a cold that was annoying but not bad, we have succumbed to a virus that is making us miserable.  We have the body aches and fatigue and general misery going on in our house.  Poor Eric has an outer ear infection for which he went to urgent care this morning.  He is on antibiotics so hopefully he will be as good as new pretty soon.  My main complaint besides the body aches has been nausea.  It feels like morning sickness but it's not.  I have been both blessed and cursed with an iron stomach.  I have wanted to throw up the past couple of days but I just don't have the ability to do it.  Thankfully the boys seem to be just fine other than being on the verge of cutting their third tooth.  Let's just say that A&W were in bed a little early tonight. They were really happy and sweet most of the day but towards the end of the afternoon it was getting a little hairy.

So no one is really happy in our house today but I am hoping it's gonna look up as the weekend progresses.  We were bummed because our church's Harvest Blessing dinner, a fun annual fellowship meal, was tonight but we obviously did not go.  The weekend can only improve our situation, right?  Time for me to go to bed.

Eight Months!

Here I am again writing another monthly post for the boys and realizing that they are now much closer to the toddler stage than the itty bitty baby stage.  I am loving this age for many reasons.  The boys sleep well, they eat well, their personalities are blossoming and most of all, they cannot crawl away yet!

The boys generally eat three meals of solids a day and are still being breastfed.  On a typical day they wake up in the morning between 5-6 am and are nursed for 'first breakfast.'  The boys will go back to sleep for a couple hours after that if it is the weekend and we can sleep in.  Midmorning they eat oatmeal mixed with breast milk.  The rest of their meals during the day is based on how their naps go.  Typically they take two naps a day.  Normally the morning nap is their power nap at about 45 minutes to an hour and the afternoon nap is their longer nap (hopefully) ranging from 1.5 hours to 2.5 hours.  And while the boys are identical twins, there is nothing identical about their sleep patterns.  They are different people and one is typically fighting nap time or waking up from their nap sooner than the other.  The minute you think you have them figured out, they do something different.  Thankfully we are on a very consistent bed time routine and they both go down between 6-7 pm. 

The boys eat fruits or vegetables for dinner.  Thus far they have been introduced to carrots, yams, sweet peas, green beans, pumpkin, apple sauce and bananas.  I have not had to buy any baby food yet because all the stuff the boys have eaten was made by me or their grammy.  The boys love their food.  Winston starts grunting as soon as he realizes that the food is coming.  Abraham starts the whiny cry.  It's cute but also annoying.  So with all this demand for food, these boys have been packing on the weight this last month.  Most of the clothes they are in right now are 12 mos.  I am incredulous that my smallish babies are now on the bigger end of the spectrum.  I don't have any stats to share until their nine month appointment but these kids are growing before our eyes. 

 We are fans of food.  We are food fans you could say. 

Winston: "I am smiling because I am about to eat."

Abraham: "Seriously mom, quit with the pics and just feed me now."

They are learning to push up on their hands and knees and can rock back and forth.  They do not last too long before they konk out and just lay back down on their tummies.  They are also beginning to be able to stay sitting up on their own.  Abraham has mastered it more than Winston at this point.  He lifts his hands up and tightens his whole upper body.  He tends to flex his muscles when he is proud of something that he has accomplished as if to say, "Hey, look at what I can do." I will give a mama confession here and admit that I am a little worried about Winston not being able to sit without using his hands to support himself.  He can do it without his hands but then he falls forward or back a couple seconds later.  I am telling myself to not compare the two of them.  One thing that I did find encouraging is that Winston now sees things that he wants to touch and will roll toward it and reach for it.  Abraham however can be more content to lay on the floor and pick at the blanket.  Maybe Abraham is just more observant or introspective whereas Winston wants to explore? Winston may not be motivated to sit because it does not benefit his curiosity. Time will tell but it does follow their previous patterns. 

 Their little noses were still red here from having the sniffles.

 "Mom, that black thing on your face makes you look pretty funny."

 "What, you want us to actually pose and smile?"

 "Hi, I am Winston. I am cute. I also happen to share clothes with my brother."

"Hey there.  How you doin'? I am Abraham."

Abraham says: "Look ma, no hands!"

"No more sitting.  We're spent."

Funny/cute things that Abraham does:  He is still obsessed with his hands and now he loves playing with mama's hands when he is being held.  He likes to slap things with an open hand so I have been teaching him high fives.  I show him how to do it and keep saying, "High fives." Sometimes he will do it now with me just saying the phrase, "Give me high fives."  His current default mode seems to be blowing raspberries.  It's constant, whether he is happy or upset--fart noises all the time.  What a boy, huh?  Abraham is the type that when he is ready to sleep, he really wants to go to sleep.  The other week when he was fighting the cold he fell asleep in the jumper.  I took him out and was going to put him down for a nap.  I decided he needed a diaper change first.  I laid him down on the changing table and he opened his eyes slightly and lifted his legs to help me get him undressed.  He then kept his eyes closed tight for the entire diaper change and I transferred him to the crib without so much as a peep.  He wanted to sleep so I did not talk to him while changing him.  He was making it quite clear that he was trying to stay in sleepy mode. 

Funny/cute things Winston does: This kid likes hitting things with his head.  No joke.  The first time Eric and I saw it we just about died laughing.  He was in the exersaucer staring at one of his toys and proceeded to slam his head into it.  Then he looked at us as if to say, "That was not as fun as I thought it was going to be."  He is determined however and does it quite often.  I am not sure what he is expecting from it all. When I ask for kisses for mama, he starts moving his head like a woodpecker on the side of my face.  I thought he nearly broke my jaw the other night.  We are still working on what gentle means obviously.  Winston also growls.  It is so funny to hear this little cherubic looking baby make this deep throated sound.  I still laugh every time he does it. 

In the morning when I go into the nursery to get these little guys ready for the day, they each have the sweetest smile and seem thrilled to see me.  It is seriously the best thing in the world.  We are so thankful to have these happy boys and grateful that they are thriving. 

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

Play time before bed:

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Making Each Other Laugh

One aspect of being married to Eric that I love is how he makes me laugh.  Eric can make me laugh more than anyone and more than that he can make me laugh at myself. Laughing at yourself I think is important, to not take one's self too seriously. Eric gets more leverage than anybody when it comes to teasing me. Last night was a perfect example of how we like to rile one another up. 

I mentioned recently that we had a new door installed.  Our friend that installed the door did not realize that we already had a dead bolt on the old door so he had bought one that we did not end up needing.  I mentioned to Eric that we needed to return the deadbolt since Tim had taken the one off the old door to use on the new door.  Eric was adamant that there was a new dead bolt on the new door.  First he stated that the old dead bolt was brass.  Umm, no it was not.  Then he mentioned that the 'new' deadbolt turned the opposite way of the old one. In that he was correct but then I ventured to suggest that maybe it was just installed upside down compared to its old orientation.  He conceded that could be the case.  Then I just point blank told him that I was positive that the deadbolt was the same otherwise we would not have an extra one we needed to return.  Well, he took that as fighting words and trumped down the hall to get his shoes to go outside and see if the old deadbolt was still in the old door laying on the side of the house.  He was out there for a little while.

Eric came inside and stated,"Well, all the locks to the house are keyed the same.  If it was the same lock then it would work with this key."

Yep, that dead bolt turned right away with the house key.

I asked with fake modesty, "Ummm, is there anything you need to say?"

We just smiled at each other and then he told me he was sorry for thinking that I was wrong.  And that is what I also love about my hubby, he is so quick to admit when he is wrong and that he is sorry.  Of course, I seek to admit right away when I know I am wrong as well. We then laughed because we never seem to fight about 'important' things. One thing we often say in situations like this after the situation is resolved is: "Are you sure you don't want to have a fight about 'fill-in-the blank stupid thing'?" We realize how dumb it sounds as soon as we shut the budding argument down. True story, our first fight was about a water proof wallet during our honeymoon but that is another story for another day.  The point is that we are learning with each successive year of marriage how to effectively communicate with one another and to let go of petty arguments.  We laugh instead...and this is vital for two people as stubborn as mules who happened to fall in love with one another and get married.

The traditional self-pic

I am glad that we can use humor to point out to one another how silly we are sometimes.  I love that my best friend and I can make each other laugh and that we can spend the rest of our lives perfecting it.

Eric here, yes this really did happen and I approve this message... =)

FAQs #1

In an effort to complete a post for every day in November for NaBloPoMo, I am running through ideas I have had for posts in the past but never seem to get to.  I will be answering frequently asked questions(FAQs).  These question and answers will pertain to having twins and all that it entails.  I don't have a problem with people asking a lot of questions about the boys when we are out and about but what makes me incredulous is when they ask a question, you answer and they argue with you.  In my head I am thinking, "Hey, I am their mom.  I think I would be the one to know." People mean well but there is a lot of myth and miseducation when it comes to twins. So here it goes, some of the frequently asked questions:

Are your twins identical? 
Yes, our boys are identical.  The technical term is monozygotic.  Abraham and Winston were once a single zygote hence they are monozygotic twins.  In that one zygote was all the genetic information that was needed to form a baby.  That single zygote then split to form two separate embryos.  It's pretty incredible to think about how that zygote split and God made two separate babies with two separate intellects and personalities from it.  Monozygotic twins are not carbon copies of one another however due to the physical expression of their genes, that is their phenotype.  The zygote splitting is not a perfect 50/50 split.  One embryo may gain more copies of a gene than another.  A gene may be "turned off" in one embryo and active in another.  Identical twins often look very similar but have many differences as well.  I know a set of identical twins that look very much alike but one has visibly curly hair while the other twin has straighter hair.  Most people know that monozygotic twins still have different fingerprints from one another.  All that to say, monozygotic twins are unique and are not "identical" in the sense that the term is often used. 

How do you know?
We were told that our twins were monozygotic at one of our earliest ultrasounds due to the presence of only one placenta.  Fraternal twins have two separate placentas (since they are conceived as entirely different embryos) and identical twins almost always have a single placenta.  So the boys each had their own amniotic sac but shared their oxygen and food supply through a single chorion.  These twins are known as diamniotic monochorionic (di-mo) twins.  There are cases of the placenta of fraternal twins fusing and looking like a single placenta. When the boys were born, I asked the doctor if it did indeed look like a single placenta.  All signs pointed to a single placenta and while we never had the genetic test done to absolutely confirm that they are monozygotic, we are almost positive they are.

Hmmm, I thought identical twins were always in the same sac.

Nope.  Monoamniotic monochorionic (mo-mo) twins are very rare and when it does happen there is a very high chance of fatality because with no membrane separating the babies, they can easily tangle up their cords and cut off each other's blood supply.  The membrane between the boys was very apparent even at our first ultrasound.  Sure it may look like the babies are really touching one another but they each have their own sturdy amniotic sac containing them and keeping them safe. 

So do you think our boys look identical?

Recharge

So we really laid low this weekend.  With Eric getting back late on Friday night and subsequently not feeling too well after we got back from the childhood conversion seminar, we are working on getting the whole family recuperated which meant lots of rest.  Eric and I are fighting what the babies had.  The boys are doing really well but we just have the congestion and headache that we are still trying to fight off.  No church for us today which was a big bummer but it's no good spreading the sickness around to even more people.  We actually did okay with the time change last night.  The boys happened to take a longer nap in the afternoon and did not wake up until close to 5:00 pm.  Once they were up, it was only an hour before they were getting ready for bed again.  They jib jabbed in their cribs for quite a while and eventually fell asleep.  They woke up at 5:40 am which would normally be 6:40 am and that is within their normal time range if not a bit later. 

In laying low, I was looking at ideas for the boys' first birthday party online.  I was even getting Eric excited about it.  I am trying to come up with decorating ideas that are not expensive and I think I have some pretty good ideas. I would love to hop on the Pinterest bandwagon but I think I need to hold out a while longer.  I know it would be a big temptation and a time suck for me. 

I think the boys can totally say 'dada' but they pick and choose when they want to.  Winston was in the exersaucer today and Eric was talking to him.  He looked right at Eric and said 'dada' clear as could be.  He would not repeat it of course.  The last week when Eric was gone they did not say dada which is a pretty common sound for them to normally make.  Coincidence?  Maybe it is but it's fun to think they are getting that much closer to being able to talk to us.  I look forward to all the many many questions that I will need to field and answer over the coming years. 

Here are my baby boys in the pajamas that their great grandma Ida sent them.  Did I mention that these pajamas are in the 12 mos. size and fit perfectly?  These boys have been growing like weeds in the last month.

Children, Sin and Salvation

This morning our church hosted a childhood conversion seminar.  Even though Eric got in late last night, he got up with me and we went to the seminar with the boys.  The premise of it was evangelizing to our children.  We know through Scripture that man is born into sin.  It can be hard to look at our little babies and realize that they were born into iniquity (Psalm 51:5).  We also know through Scripture that the Holy Spirit is the one that changes our hearts and allows us to see Christ as more desirable and beautiful than our sin (2 Thess. 2:13).  The gospel cannot transform without a clear presentation however and that is where the duty of the parent comes in to teach their children.  The primary point was that the first way we teach our children the gospel is through example in our own lives.  I felt really convicted when the speaker asked if we thought we were the godliest people in our children's lives.  I cannot confidently say that I am.  I can think of lots of great examples that our children have but it made me more determined to be the person that I want my children to become.  A lot of techniques were discussed such as bible reading, memorization, catechizing, media resources. etc.  The seminar touched on what genuine conversion was and that if our children make a profession at an early age to foster and encourage that.  The litmus test so to speak with conversion is that time alone will show if that child has the genuine fruits of repentance.  We cannot encourage our children in easy believism--that a prayer recited will save them without the genuine heart change behind it.  It was all good stuff that I had thought about before but becomes a lot more real when I ponder needing to teach the gospel to my own children.

When Eric and I were still expecting our twin boys, we were given the book Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp.  We really enjoyed the book and it was a great conversation tool when it came to discussing parenting approaches.  The book emphasizes that the last thing we want to impress upon our children is moralism.  It can be so easy in trying to teach and train good behavior in our children to fail to address the heart issues behind them.  This then teaches children to simply conform on the outside while their heart remains dark.  We do not need little Pharisees that love rules and know how to stick to them yet have hearts like white washed tombs.  It's our sacred duty as parents to teach our children that their sin is bad because it grieves their Heavenly Father and not only because their bad behavior will get them punished by mom and dad.

We pray for our children daily.  We know that we can provide Abraham and Winston every comfort on this earth but that if we fail to teach them their need for a Savior that we will have failed  miserably.  We will not only have failed our children but sinned against them and our God.  Ultimately we need lots and lots of grace.  We need grace to live lives that exemplify Christ and demonstrate His love.  We need grace to show our children that we need repentance just as much as they do and follow through on that by asking their forgiveness when we sin against them.  We need grace to follow through on spiritual disciplines such as Scripture reading and prayer that will help teach our children about God's love.  We need grace to implement discipline techniques that are effective but don't embitter our children (Col. 3:21).  We need grace to have the words to say when questions are asked and doubts are shared.  Ultimately we cannot transfer our faith to our children but we can be faithful in evangelizing to them.